How to Write

4 College Essay Examples Worth Learning From

Every year, thousands of college essays make their way to admissions officers. And every time they open a new essay, the admissions officer asks themselves, “Is this person a good fit for our school? Will they thrive here? What will they bring to the table?”

A college essay is your chance to leave a lasting impression on the admissions officer and make your overall application stronger. To seize it, however, you’ll need to focus on what matters the most for admissions: authentic voice, specifics, and personal growth.

Not sure how to put your best foot forward when answering college essay prompts? DoMyEssay’s essay help experts handpicked four successful real-world examples to help you out, complete with a breakdown of what makes them great. Keep scrolling to learn how to write outstanding college essays with expert tips, strong examples, and mistakes to avoid.

7 Markings of a Strong College Essay

Every admissions officer has to sift through hundreds or even thousands of college essays within a given admissions cycle. So, how do you make sure your essay will actually stay with them?

In our experience, most successful college essays have several qualities in common. They:

  • Reflect your authentic voice and personality, reading as something unmistakably yours
  • Tell a compelling story and often start with a relevant anecdote
  • Give insight into how certain experiences shaped you into who you are today
  • Unveil an emotional truth about you, showing vulnerability if appropriate
  • Don’t embellish the reality or use an overly poetic writing style
  • Stay concise and clear from the first line to the last
  • Are well-organized, with no unnecessary rambling

You might be tempted to list as many achievements as possible in a misguided attempt to “sell yourself.” But that list belongs in your resume, not the college essay. Instead, focus on reflecting on your experiences.

As for the structure, here’s your formula for a strong college essay:

  • Introduction: Powerful attention-grabber (hook) + the essay’s central idea or message
  • Main body: Several paragraphs that develop the idea or story, with concrete examples and vivid details
  • Conclusion: Throwback to the introduction + restated central idea
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4 College Essay Examples & Why They Worked

Perusing good college essay examples is a great way to see what works and what doesn’t, and that’s why we’ve prepared these four strong examples for you. Our experts have also broken down what makes them so compelling, be it the essay format for college or a well-crafted narrative.

College Essay Example #1: “A Sickness in the Family”

I learned how to count time in hospital waiting rooms.

Not in minutes or hours, but in the rhythm of beeping monitors, the rustle of nurses’ shoes, and the way my mother’s hands tightened when a doctor walked toward us. When I was fifteen, my younger brother was diagnosed with a chronic autoimmune condition that turned our household upside down. Overnight, I stopped being “the older sibling” and became the extra set of hands, the translator of medical jargon, and sometimes the quiet one who swallowed fear so that there could be room for everyone else’s.

At first, I resented it. I resented the cancelled plans, the evenings spent reheating leftovers after hospital visits, and the constant uncertainty that followed us like a shadow. I told myself I was being strong, but in truth, I was avoiding the vulnerability that came with admitting I was overwhelmed. Strength, I believed, meant silence.

That belief cracked one night in the emergency room. My brother was asleep, curled into himself, and my mother was filling out yet another stack of forms. I remember staring at a vending machine, its flickering light reflecting my own exhaustion back at me. For the first time, I let myself cry, albeit not quietly, not briefly, but fully. In that moment, I realized that resilience was not about enduring endlessly; it was about allowing yourself to feel, and then choosing to keep going anyway.

The next morning, I began to change how I showed up. Instead of pretending everything was fine, I started asking questions, real ones. I learned to track medication schedules, recognize early warning signs, and speak up during appointments when something didn’t make sense. At home, I became more patient, not because I forced myself to be, but because I understood the weight we were all carrying.

This shift spilled into other parts of my life. At school, I stopped measuring my worth solely by grades and started valuing consistency and effort. When my chemistry test scores dipped during a particularly difficult month, I met with my teacher instead of internalizing failure. When a classmate confided in me about their own struggles, I listened without trying to fix everything. I had learned that presence alone could be powerful.

Perhaps the most meaningful growth came in how I redefined success. Before, I chased perfection: straight A’s, flawless performances, visible achievements. Now, success looked quieter: a week without a hospital visit, a shared laugh during dinner, a moment of calm in the middle of chaos. These moments taught me gratitude, not as a fleeting feeling, but as a daily practice.

My brother’s illness is not a challenge I “overcame.” It is ongoing, unpredictable, and deeply real. But through it, I have grown into someone who is adaptable, empathetic, and unafraid of uncertainty. I have learned that vulnerability is not a weakness, but a bridge to understanding, connection, and growth.

As I look toward college, I carry these lessons with me. I know there will be moments when plans unravel and expectations fall short. But I also know how to sit with discomfort, ask for help, and move forward with intention. I am ready not because I have all the answers, but because I have learned how to face the questions and keep going.

Lessons to learn:

  • Show vulnerability and be emotionally honest. The essay tells a story that’s deeply personal, all without blatantly trying to score “sympathy points.”
  • Have a personal growth arc. This narrative follows the author’s journey from resentment and fear of vulnerability to new perspectives on strength and success.
  • Pay attention to detail. The author turns to specifics whenever possible, from the exact changes in his life (e.g., cancelled plans) to his new definition of gratitude.
  • Start strong. The first paragraph is one sentence long, and it plunges the reader right into the thick of the new reality the author found himself in.
  • Address gaps in passing. It’s a “blink, and you’ll miss” moment, but the author mentions their grades slipping up. That provides the much-needed context to explain worse grades, without feeling like the whole point of the essay is to justify them.

College Essay Example #2: “Picking Things Apart to Learn What Makes Them Tick”

The first time I took apart a clock, I wasn’t trying to fix it. I just wanted to know why it worked.

I was ten, sitting at the kitchen table with a screwdriver that was far too big for my hands. Springs jumped, gears rolled away, and by the end, the clock never ticked again. But instead of feeling disappointed, I felt exhilarated. I had seen the hidden order beneath something ordinary. That curiosity eventually became the quiet force shaping how I see the world.

As I grew older, that curiosity found a home in computer science. My first program was a simple calculator, built late at night after watching free tutorials online. It barely worked, but when the screen displayed the correct output, I felt the same thrill I had felt with the clock: I had created logic from nothing. Code, I learned, was not just a tool; it was a language for asking questions and testing ideas.

What drew me deeper was not the efficiency of algorithms, but the creativity behind them. In high school, I began designing small projects to solve everyday problems. I built a scheduling app for my debate team after watching teammates struggle to coordinate practice times. I wrote a script that organized my family’s medical documents into searchable folders, reducing the stress of last-minute hospital visits. Each project reinforced a value I hold deeply: knowledge is most meaningful when it serves others.

Yet, my passion was not without frustration. Debugging code often meant hours of staring at a screen, convinced I had done everything right, all while knowing something was wrong. Early on, I took these moments personally, equating errors with failure. Over time, I learned to see mistakes differently. They were no longer proof of inadequacy; they were invitations to think more carefully. This mindset reshaped how I approach challenges beyond programming, teaching me patience, humility, and persistence.

My interest in computer science also sharpened my sense of responsibility. As technology becomes more embedded in daily life, I began questioning not just what we can build, but what we should build. Through independent reading and class discussions, I explored topics like data privacy and algorithmic bias. These questions mattered to me because they connected technology to human experience. I want to build systems that are transparent, inclusive, and designed with empathy, not just efficiency.

This passion has shaped my goals. In college, I hope to study computer science alongside fields like ethics or public policy, bridging technical skill with social awareness. I am especially interested in using technology to improve access, whether through educational tools, healthcare systems, or community-based platforms that amplify underrepresented voices. My past projects were small, but they taught me that even simple tools can make meaningful differences.

Looking forward, I don’t imagine a future defined by titles or accolades, but by impact. I want to be someone who asks better questions, who listens before building, and who remembers that behind every dataset is a person. The same curiosity that led me to dismantle a clock now drives me to understand complex systems, technical and human alike.

I never fixed that clock. But in taking it apart, I discovered a passion that continues to guide me: the desire to understand how things work, and the responsibility to use that understanding thoughtfully. College, for me, is not the destination of that journey, but the space where curiosity, values, and purpose can finally meet.

Lessons to learn:

  • Show how your past drives your aspirations. The essay reads like a story of how the author came to fall in love with computer science. All the examples mentioned throughout show that their goals didn’t emerge out of nowhere.
  • Put your values into the spotlight. The author will definitely stand out as someone aware of and in sync with their values. Each value comes with a concrete reason why it matters to them, along with examples of how they’ve developed it.
  • Keep your narrative authentic. The essay opens with an anecdote, and it’s told with enough vivid details to make it engaging. Throughout the text, the author sticks to their voice.
  • Refer to the introduction at the end. The author added a throwback to the anecdote in the introduction, which solidifies the overall narrative.

College Essay Example #3: “One Dumpling at a Time”

Every Sunday morning, my family gathers around the kitchen table to make dumplings. Three generations stand shoulder to shoulder: my grandmother rolling dough with practiced ease, my parents debating the correct filling ratio, and me carefully folding each dumpling, trying to imitate hands that have done this for decades. The kitchen is loud, crowded, and imperfect. It is the place where I learned who I am.

My family immigrated to the United States before I was born, carrying with them a language, traditions, and expectations shaped by sacrifice. Growing up, I lived between worlds. At home, I spoke my parents’ native language, celebrated holidays my classmates had never heard of, and absorbed stories of a homeland I knew only through photographs and memory. At school, I learned to navigate a culture that prized independence and self-expression. For a long time, I believed I had to choose one world or the other.

That tension surfaced most clearly when I was younger. I avoided bringing friends home, embarrassed by accents that did not match those on television or lunches that smelled unfamiliar. I shortened my name so that teachers could pronounce it more easily, telling myself it didn’t matter. I wanted to blend in, even if it meant leaving parts of myself behind.

As I grew older, I began to understand the cost of that erasure. Listening to my grandparents describe rebuilding their lives from nothing, I realized that the very differences I once hid were rooted in resilience. Their stories were not just about hardship, but about adaptability, community, and hope. Slowly, I started reclaiming what I had tried to minimize.

I joined a cultural club at school, not as an expert but as a learner. I began sharing my family’s traditions with friends, inviting them to dumpling-making nights where laughter crossed language barriers. In English class, I wrote about translation, not just of words, but of identities, and discovered that my perspective enriched discussions rather than isolating me. I learned that identity is not a limitation; it is a lens.

This lens shapes how I engage with the world. Growing up in a bilingual household taught me to listen carefully and speak thoughtfully. Watching my parents balance multiple jobs while supporting extended family abroad instilled in me a deep respect for responsibility and interdependence. I approach group work with collaboration in mind, understanding that progress is rarely individual. I value community because I have seen how survival itself can depend on it.

On a college campus, I bring this perspective with intention. I am someone who bridges spaces between cultures, viewpoints, and experiences. I am comfortable sitting with complexity and asking questions that invite dialogue. Whether contributing to classroom discussions, participating in cultural organizations, or collaborating on projects, I aim to create environments where people feel seen and heard.

I no longer see my background as something to explain away. It is the foundation of my curiosity, empathy, and resilience. The same kitchen table that once felt confining now feels expansive. It is now a place where history, identity, and belonging converge.

As I prepare for college, I carry my family’s stories not as a burden, but as a gift. They remind me that growth comes from embracing multiplicity, and that strength often emerges from in-between spaces. I look forward to joining a campus community where diverse stories intersect, and where I can both learn from others and contribute my own, one carefully folded dumpling at a time.

Lessons to learn:

  • Offer a unique perspective. In this essay, the perspective revolves around the challenges of growing up “between two worlds.” At the same time, the essay has a clear arc of accepting and learning from cultural differences, which shows a great deal of reflection.
  • Reflect on your sense of identity. If you come from an underrepresented or disadvantaged background, your essay can be the place to reflect on it. This will make for a distinct, authentic narrative. But if that’s not the case, you can still reflect on how your sense of self has changed and what you’ve learned from it.
  • Show what you bring to the table. This essay both describes the lessons drawn and states how the author would bring this experience to campus. Your cultural background isn’t the only thing that can count here: you can instead focus on academic curiosity, for example.

College Essay Example #4: “Messy Backpack with a Stone in It”

If you were to open my backpack at any given moment, you would not find a carefully curated reflection of who I am. Instead, you would find chaos: a cracked notebook filled with half-written ideas, a pen that only works when shaken aggressively, a granola bar I keep forgetting to eat, and a small, smooth stone I picked up years ago and have carried ever since. Somehow, all of it belongs.

The stone is the strangest item. I found it on a hiking trail when I was twelve, dull and unremarkable except for the way it fit perfectly in my palm. I slipped it into my pocket without thinking. Over time, it became a habit. When I was nervous, I would rub my thumb across its surface, grounding myself. The stone has followed me through exams, competitions, late-night study sessions, and moments when I wasn’t sure who I was becoming.

I have always been a work in progress. As a child, I tried on identities the way others tried on jackets: artist, scientist, writer, leader, observer. I was rarely the loudest voice in the room, but I was always listening, collecting fragments of stories, questions, and possibilities. My notebook reflects this tendency. Its pages are messy: diagrams collide with poetry, to-do lists interrupt philosophical questions, and margins overflow with arrows pointing nowhere in particular. For a long time, I worried that this lack of order meant I lacked direction.

School often rewards clarity and polish. Answers are expected to be clean, arguments linear, and success measurable. I learned how to perform that version of myself well enough. But my most meaningful learning happened in the spaces between structure. It happened when a class discussion wandered off-script, and I asked a question that didn’t have an answer yet. It happened when a project failed and forced me to rethink not just my approach, but my assumptions. Like my pen, I discovered that sometimes I work best after a little shaking.

Creativity, for me, is not about producing something impressive; it is about paying attention. I notice patterns others overlook, connections that are not immediately obvious. I enjoy sitting with ambiguity long enough for it to reveal something unexpected. This is why I am drawn to interdisciplinary thinking; this is why I resist choosing a single lens when multiple perspectives can coexist. The world, after all, rarely presents itself in neat categories.

The stone in my backpack reminds me of this. It did not change in any obvious way over the years, but I did. What once served as a comfort became a reminder of continuity. I could grow, question, and redefine myself without losing what grounded me. I did not need to discard old versions of myself to make room for new ones.

On a college campus, I imagine myself much the same way: curious, slightly disorganized, and deeply engaged. I am the student who will ask the question that reframes a discussion, who will connect ideas across disciplines, and who will listen carefully before speaking. I bring not just achievements, but attentiveness. Not just ambition, but openness.

My backpack will still be messy. There will still be unfinished thoughts and forgotten snacks. But there will also be room for new ideas, unfamiliar perspectives, and experiences that challenge me. I am not arriving at college as a finished product. I am arriving as someone willing to explore, to question, and to carry small reminders of where I have been.

The stone will come with me. Not because it is extraordinary, but because it proves something important: meaning is not always loud or obvious. Sometimes, it is something small you carry quietly, shaping you over time. That is how I move through the world and how I hope to move through college.

Lessons to learn:

  • Don’t be afraid to use metaphors and similes. Yes, if you’re not good at it, it’s probably better to steer clear of literary devices. But this essay is a great example of why you should dare to try. The author’s metaphors (“a work in progress”) and similes (“like my pen”) make the whole narrative more vivid and memorable.
  • Focus on your personality. Unlike the previous examples, this essay doesn’t focus on achievements or hardships. Instead, its central message revolves around who the author is: “a work in progress” with a messy backpack. They also turn it into an advantage they’d bring to the campus.
  • Share memorable details. You’ll probably remember the person with a stone in their backpack long after you close our guide. And that’s exactly the effect you should strive to achieve with your essay. Is it a weird fact? Yes. But that’s what makes it memorable.

5 College Essay Types You Should Know

Yes, you should strive to make your college essay as unique as possible. That said, if you don’t know what to focus on, you’d be happy to discover that most college essays fall into one of the five categories below. Think of them as approaches you can pick from when crafting your essay:

Type Guidelines Best for
Challenge/adversity essay Describe how you overcame obstacles and what you learned from the experience Addressing gaps in transcripts or subpar grades
Improving an otherwise weak application
Passion/interest essay Focus on your love for a subject or hobby throughout the years Showing a history of commitment to the future field of study
Identity/background essay Put your cultural background or personal history into the spotlight Highlighting how you can contribute to the diversity on campus
Creative essay Use a unique storytelling approach, metaphor, or creative voice Applying for schools and majors where creativity matters
“Why this college/major” essay Tell the admissions committee why you chose this school or major Demonstrating very specific reasons why you want to attend this school

N.B. You can add a college heading to name your essay or forego it altogether. A powerful title can make your essay more memorable, however.

Crafting a Winning Essay: 5 Steps

Ready to kick off working on your college essay? Make sure to have these five steps covered during the process:

  • Brainstorming ideas. Open a new doc or pick up a pen and think about the experiences that defined you. Consider your values, the anecdotes you can share, or the emotions you want to focus on. Use a mind map to organize your ideas.
  • Choosing the topic. Select the most meaningful, impactful experiences and connect them around a single theme. Come up with a clear thesis statement (i.e., a central message or idea for your essay).
  • Creating the outline. List key points to cover in each paragraph. Plan the introduction (with a hook and thesis), main body (with key details and insights), and conclusion (with future goals or reflection). 
  • Writing the first draft. Infuse your essay with sensory details and specifics. Show, don’t tell: instead of saying you have strong critical thinking skills, describe a situation where they came to your rescue. Make sure to tell a story.
  • Revising for clarity and authenticity. You might be tempted to make your draft sound more “professional” or “formal”. Don’t. Preserve your authentic voice, instead. That said, keep your essay concise and clear and get rid of mistakes and typos.

Beware These 5 Pitfalls

As unfortunate as it is, many applicants harm their chances of enrollment because they misunderstand what the college essay is meant to achieve. While reviewing the dozens of examples of college essays for this guide, our experts noticed these five common mistakes. Don’t let them be your downfall:

  • Listing accomplishments. Your essay should have a single narrative, focus on a select few experiences, and clearly show you’ve reflected on their significance and impact.
  • Firing up clichés or foregoing specifics. That’s a great recipe for writing a forgettable essay. Don’t call your lab internship a “life-changing experience.” Describe why it was meaningful to you, instead.
  • Embellishing your language. Would you ever use the word “utilize” instead of “use” in daily life? If not, don’t start doing it in your essay. The same goes for flowery or pretentious language.
  • Overlooking the importance of revising. If you don’t dedicate enough time to it, you’ll probably end up submitting an essay riddled with mistakes and random ramblings.
  • Writing what you think they want to read. The more you care about that, the less sincere and authentic your essay will be. Speak your truth and stay true to yourself.

Bad College Essay Examples: What Not to Do

Knowing what not to do is as important as following an expert’s “to-do” tips. So, let’s review a couple of excerpts from poorly written college essays and break down what exactly is wrong with them.

My mother died while giving birth to my younger brother; I was six. I never knew my father. Life in foster care was tough, but we managed to get by. The dream of becoming an engineer sustained me.

What’s wrong? This is an introduction that essentially tries to pull at the officer’s heartstrings, but instead screams, “too much information.” It’s unclear how these (undeniably traumatic) experiences are supposed to be relevant to the author’s desire to become an engineer. Instead, they could’ve described their first feat of engineering or their participation in a science fair.

I’ve got plenty of leadership experience. I was elected the president of our chess club within just a year. I was also the team captain in a debate tournament; we made it to the state finals. Finally, I was in charge of the student-led project to collect donations for the Salvation Army in my sophomore year.

What’s wrong? This whole passage reads like a resume, just in paragraph form. Instead of listing all these facts, it would’ve been better if the author had chosen to focus on just one to illustrate their leadership experience. Plus, the first sentence is hollow and generic. Instead, we would’ve advised describing how that one experience challenged them and what they learned from it.

How to Revise Your Draft Like a Pro

We’ve already mentioned that revising the draft is one of the key ingredients for writing a good essay. Why? Well, it’s simple: no one can write an excellent college essay on the first try.

So, leave your draft alone, even if just for an hour or two, and return to it with a fresh pair of eyes. While you’re reviewing and editing it:

  • Read it out loud to pinpoint unnatural turns of phrases or mismatches in tone 
  • Run the draft through a grammar checker and proofread the text (checkers do miss some mistakes)
  • Do another read to make passages more concise, edit for clarity, and improve the flow
  • Read it once more to check for consistency in tone, voice, word choice, and tense
  • Verify your essay meets the word count requirements

Note: It’s always a good idea to ask someone else to read your essay before you submit it. Seek feedback from your mentors, teachers, or peers.

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In Closing

The college essay is your one and only chance to show the admissions officer who you are beyond test scores, grades, and demographics. So, make the most out of it: stay true to your voice, reflect on meaningful experiences, and tell your one-of-a-kind story.

While you’re at it, feel free to return to the examples and tips we provided in this guide. That said, don’t try to imitate or simply copy these examples. Remember: your essay has to be unmistakably yours, not someone else’s.

Can’t help but wonder, “Can’t someone help me write my college essay?” Good news: we can! DoMyEssay’s experts can give your draft a final polish while preserving your authentic voice or write one based on your notes and ideas!

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